I write this as you sleep. Your busy toddler mind finally at rest, your body finally still. I watch you in the monitor, at the steady rise and fall of your chest, your dark hair splayed out over your face. You look so peaceful, your innocence wrapped up in the soft toys that surround you. So good and pure, this world yet to blemish your heart and change the filter in which your eyes only see goodness.

This scares me – to know that eventually, as you grow, you will lose the wonder of childhood. Your mind, older and able to comprehend more, will be subjected to the ways of this world, views and attitudes that are unrealistic. There will be people who are cruel and thoughtless and tear down the way in which you see yourself, and possibly destroy the self-worth I have tried so hard to instill in you.

And so this scares me – to know that all this is completely out of my control. So I do the only thing I can think of doing: I write in words what I feel in my heart. One day when you are old enough, you can read this. You can read my words, and hopefully absorb them into your beautiful mind, so that they are with you wherever you go. And the most important thing – please believe them. Don’t let these words wash over you. Instead, take them to heart, build a foundation within yourself that is so strong that not even the harshest of words or critics will tear them down.

Here is what I want to say to you, my darling girl:

Know your self-worth. Keep your thoughts about yourself positive. When the negative voice rears its ugly head, squash it down as soon as you can, because, believe me, once you let this voice take control, it is very hard to overpower. People can be cruel, but if you listen to your negative critic, you will become your own worst enemy.

You are not perfect, but you are perfectly YOU. There will be things you don’t like about yourself. Maybe you’ll have a big nose, maybe you’ll be too hairy, maybe you’ll be too loud (you have Italian heritage, after all). Maybe you’ll have frizzy hair (sorry, blame your mother for that one), or maybe you’ll just think you’re not pretty or smart enough. Don’t look to other people for validation of how you should be. You are YOU, focus on what you can do and not what you can’t. That being said, don’t be a quitter. Always keep trying and believing you CAN.

Don’t be a doormat. Be strong in your beliefs and what you stand for. Don’t let people walk all over you. Be assertive. But don’t be over-bearing or narrow minded. Respect other people’s ideas and beliefs, and don’t enforce your way of thinking onto everyone you meet. But your ideas and opinions matter, don’t ever feel like your existence is pointless. You don’t have to stand out in a crowd to be seen and heard. Let your kindness and humility shine through.

Be grateful. Be gentle and kind. When you feel like your life is the worst, when you let negative emotions shadow your days, just remember – there is always someone in a worse situation. We are rich if we have love in our lives, a house to call home, and food to fill our bellies. Don’t let social media make you think material possessions will solve all your problems.
Be the kind of person people gravitate towards. Be gentle and kind, humble, generous, caring. Smile and laugh often. Don’t take yourself too seriously. See the good in life.

Lastly, you are never alone. When you feel like no one understands, when no one cares, no one loves you, well guess what…not true. I do! I am your mother, and as long as I live, you have me. I am your biggest fan, your greatest supporter. I love you unconditionally and always. Let me be here for you, and I will try to make you feel warm and safe, like I did when you were a baby, tucked up perfectly in my arms.

Learn from my mistakes, and don’t waste your precious life doubting who you are. I have done this for too long, and so I will give anything for you to believe wholeheartedly in yourself.

There are lots of scary things a mother has to worry about, but for me, letting your self-worth crumble and take away your essence and shine is one of them.

Be proud. When you are being kind to others, don’t forget to be kind to yourself.
And above all, always be true to YOU!

Love always and forever, your Mumma xo

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2 responses to “A Letter to My Girl”

  1. Nicole Suttie says:

    Emmy is very lucky. She will know this , she will feel this, and she will believe this.

    You will make her soul blossom and equally she will make yours shine in return. A mother daughter bond with a depth of love and a link that will never be unbroken.

    Suzi, you are amazing.
    I am so proud of you for following your dreams and believing in yourself.

    Your love for Emmy is a beautiful thing that will always be kept in your heart.

    Love and happiness to you both !
    Nicole ?

    • suzifaed says:

      Nicole, thank you! Such lovely words from a beautiful person. Got me all choked up 🙂
      You are amazing yourself!! Love to you xo

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Suzi Faed Author Avatar

Hello& welcome to my blog, What If Warrior

Here you will find my multi-topic blog, told from my humble point of view. I write from the heart; for me, self-expression comes easier through written words. If you would like to read more about my inspiration for this blog, click here.